Seriously, I'm gonna have to start watching TV if I want to have any sort of future in porn. It's just getting to the point where I've never heard of half the things that are getting parody-ized (is that a word? Parodized, maybe?) in porno these days. And that's not saying that the properties getting spoofed these days are without their cultural merit. Rather, I'm just so far out of the loop that I don't quite know what's what anymore. I mean, I'm familiar with The Brady Bunch, Cheers, Seinfeld and all those mega-popular shits from days of yore, but I can't say I ever heard of anything like The Big Bang Theory until Lee Roy had his way with it. Heck, I never heard of TMZ until Bangs told me he and BUCKTON were spoofing it. It makes it harder and harder to believe that no one's touched Twin Peaks yet.

Let's be clear. We here at POPPORN aren't what you would call, "lookers." We tend to be pretty lean when it comes to muscle definition, lacking in classic good-looks, a tad bit greasy and often decked out in plaid. If anything, we look more like casual lesbians than hunks of burning love so when we talk about the appearances of other human beings, we aren't in a position to judge. Frankly, we could care less what anyone chooses to do to themselves to physically alter their appearance because luckily, each of us here have a set of eyelids that allow us to easily close our eyes if something we come across doesn't fit with our opinion of what is or is not attractive.