Now, if you happened to have seen the new Lady Gaga video for her song Telephone, the question above could pretty much be used in reference to absolutely anything happening during the nine minute video-aneurysm. We haven't been this baffled by a music video since R.Kelly's, Trapped in the Closet...which we fucking LOVED by the way..."Rosey the Nosey Neighbor"? C'mon, that shit was gold. And so, it's with equal excitement that we decree that Gaga's video rules just as hard.

Okay, the title of this video implies that everybody taking part in this thing was hammered. Personally, I wasn't there, so I can't really stand behind that accusation. I mean, I'm pretty sure BUCKTON was hammered for the whole awards show. i can't really say for sure whether or not Alektra and Kaylani are. You'll have to judge for yourself. Unless the two of them show up here at POPPORN and leave a bunch of comments and whatnot, which we all hope they will.

Anyway, as you see, this is the first batch of footage we cobbled together from the hot shit AVN Awards in January. Sure, it's not exactly timely, but who the fuck gives a fuck? Come on. Lots more to come. You wait and see.

What’s the best thing to do after you break up with a guy/girl? Find some new one to sleep with. That is pretty much the basis of this movie. Alektra Blue and Tommy Gunn both get dragged out by their friends who are trying to get them to hook up with people so they can get over their exes. Before we actually see them meet up and bang we get a whole lot of other penis and vagina match-ups before hand.

You might recall around this time last year, we posted an article about the annual IVD/ECN warehouse show held in lovely Hightstown, NJ for adult store owners, vendors, retailers and the like. What made that article so interesting is that it was actually a rant about how POPPORN.com, located only 40 minutes away in Philadelphia, PA had NOT been invited to the annual gala. Sure, we might not have technically deserved to be there, but honestly, we like free shindigs with food and alcohol and thus, we felt we deserved an invite.

This past weekend, Spock and I headed up to Edison, NJ for Exxxotica NY. Now, I say this everytime, but until they stop branding it as such, Edison NJ is, in fact, in New Jersey. It is not in New York and thus, the whole Exxxotica NY thing should really be done away with. Yes, we understand that the reason it's not held closer to New York is because of legal interference, but shut up!! Call it what it is, fucking Exxxotica NJ.

You may not believe this, coming from a respectable and responsible crew like us, but...uh...we lost one of our videos. A while ago. It was pretty embarrassing. But hey, don't worry - we found them shits! Sure, it took six months to find the fuckin' tape, but as a result, you fuckers are getting treated to POPPORN's first bonafide LOST EPISODE! It's gonna be awesome!

Okay. it looks like the POPPORN jet touched down safely in Las Vegas. Thank God it did, too, because we - wait, what? Yes, we have a jet. Of course we have a jet. What, do you think we travel by fucking hot air balloon or something? What kind of two-bit shitstorm do you think we're running here?

Stop right there, you motherfuckers! Before you watch this brilliant piece of guerrilla-style, avant-garde, groundbreaking, art-house, porn-laced cinema, you gotta drag your ass back and watch part one!

In part two of THE PORNOGRAPHASMIC PHILADELPHAZATRONIC POPPORNOMATIC EXPERIENCE, Spock and Meat are fed the fuck up with these west coast smut stars and their hifalutin' 'tudes. These fuckers have no goddamn work ethic, as you'll see when Spock and Meat force the big-time stars to ship porno in our warehouse!

So, you've heard us mention that ridiculously sick party weekend of ours, right? The one with all the big-shot porno stars? The one that a lot of you were smart enough to attend, but some of you (we're lookin' at you, Dave Moves) didn't because you don't have any sense in your fucked-up skulls?

Well, regarding that weekend...

TGIF, bizzos!

Yiz'all ready for yet another round of our celebrity movie reviews? We sure fuckin' hope so, because otherwise we conned Alektra Blue into talking about her awesome interactive sex movie for nothing, and that would be a crying fucking shame.

We've been talking about our bitchin' rad weekend with porn stars for what feels like a billion years now, and who can fucking blame us? Don't answer that question, motherfuckers, or we won't share our plethora of video treasures that we captured over the course of said bitchin' rad weekend. Speaking of which, the plethora of video treasures begins now!

Alektra Blue's biggest goal with her new Wicked Pictures contract is to beef up her acting skills.

"The whole acting thing is a big step for me," Alektra told POPPORN.COM's Joey Nickels. "The fact I'm gonna have all this dialogue and I'm going to be able to pull it off. I would like to be nominated for an acting award," she said.

Alektra will be starring in nine titles per year for Wicked and will be back to working with guys other than her husband Pat Myne, a director for 3rd Degree/Zero Tolerance.