Unless you live under a rock or don't care much about minute mainstream news tidbits about the porn industry, you've probably read the scathing article on Jezebel.com about Joanna Angel being a horrible racist, due to her decision to "yellowface-up" performer Danny Wylde for his role as the one Asian guy from The Walking Dead in her new porn spoof.
Please note, I only call him "that one Asian guy" because I've never watched the show and I don't know the names of any characters, regardless of ethnicity. I don't know that one white guy's name, I don't know that one black lady's name, I don't know that Zombie kid's name. I do know that the first trade paperback of the Walking Dead was so horribly, laughably bad that it's doubtful I'll ever give either the comic or the TV version another chance, but that's another story.
At POPPORN, we do our best to steer clear of anything remotely serious because frankly, we're emotionally stunted and don't deal well with crisis. However, when we heard that one of our most favorite people in the world, Jessie Lee was injured in a car accident while on her way to Exxxotica Edison, even we felt something.
I don't really know about you guys, but here at POPPORN, we're digging the fuck out of that new Joanna Newsom album. It's boss as fuck, and it's, like, ten hours long! A true magnum opus. After hearing it, it was unanimously decided that we've got to get a interview with Madam Newsom up on our site as soon as possible. If we were lucky, she'd even break out the harp and croon out a few choice nuggets for us. if we were really, really lucky, she'd even get naked, as is the custom here at POPPORN. I mean, we're better looking than Bill Callahan, and she got down with him (and I'm talking downtown)!
Unsurprisingly, Joanna turned us down flat, and even took out a restraining order against Bangs. She's more than happy to appear on Jimmy Fallon's unfunny snooze-fest, but not on a somewhat well-regarded pornographic faux news site like ours? What's up with that?
Anyway, fuck it. We just went with the other Joanna instead. Because she gets what we're all about.
As we mentioned yesterday, sure, we brought cameras to this years 2010 AEE event but when it comes to missing the moment, it's often what we do best. As you can imagine, every adult porno star was there, hanging with fans, drinking alcohol and, in some instances, having sex in odd places at a rather large hotel/casino. It's pretty much how these things work.
Before we start, you should know that BUCKTON and Kate Hate are neighbors. Knowing that should make the opening of this video slightly more coherent.
But not much.
Given that it's Halloween weekend, I thought it might be a good idea to clue all of you groovemeisters in on the awesome shenanigans goin' down over at Burning Angel. In perfect harmony with this most ghastly of holidays, Joanna and her crew have unleashed a 35-minute fright-fuck movie called Dong of the Dead, and I gotta say, this thing looks pretty fuckin' righteous. Of course, that might just be because the thing stars James "two-scene" Deen, who not only currently holds the title of AVN's male performer of the year (for another few months, anyway), but also holds they key to POPPORN's hearts.
What a dreamboat.
Okay. Full disclosure. This video has nothing to do with abortion. Breathe easy, everybody.
Instead, BUCKTON managed to snag a few minutes with POPPORN's very favorite tattooed provocateur, Joanna Angel (as well as Misti Dawn, who ain't too bad either). The topics of conversation ranged from whether or not Joanna and James Deen are cheating on each other, whether or not it's easy to get fucked against a wall, and...uh...well, that might be about it. Sorry, we have a very limited grasp on the fine art of conversation, in case you hadn't noticed.
Parodies seem to be all the rage in porno for the last year or so. I guess it's just helping all you creepy fucks live out your fantasy of spraying your man cheese all over Marsha Brady or maybe you're into dumping some knuckle children in Lindsay Lohan's bright red snapper, which by the way you can do to POPPORN's newest fuck story TMSleaze. Well I was lucky enough to participate in a XXX parody extravaganza this past summer with Joanna Angel and her latest big feature LA Pink. It's a heart warming tale about a tattoo shop owner and her struggles with corporate fat cats, relationships and uhhh frozen pizza? Anyway I was there and was the receiver of what was called, "The best blow job scene I've ever seen" (a direct quote from the legend himself, Sean Michaels).
Hey he said it not me.
Hey suckaz...the always enchanting Peter Warren dropped this bitch-ass awesome vid into our inboxes earlier this week. We thought you may enjoy it. We can't say for sure if this is a one-off project, or an ongoing experiment in awesomeness. Only time will tell.
So, without further ado...
Scrogtails With Joanna Angel & Andy San Dimas
Welcome to Scrogtails, a new forum conceived and moderated by the illustrious Peter "Wetscrog Rex" Warren.
I mean, don't get me wrong, it is usually used for eating, but that doesn't mean that it can't be used other ways, right? Perhaps ways that would be more appropriate on an awesome porno-blog than on the Food Network? I'm sure you can see where I'm going with this. You know, sausage and peen share some similar characteristics. The shape is roughly the same, they both taste awesome (from what I've been told), and Joanna Angel seems to know a lot about having them both shoved deep inside her beautiful womanly crevices.
On Thursday, June 18th, I flew to LA for my first ever "porno vacation". Despite dealing with several connections and delayed luggage, I couldn't have been more thrilled to be in LA! Being at Joanna Angel's house is like being on BurningAngel.com in 3D or something; I immediately recognized certain spots where people have been photographed or fucked throughout the house.
Are you picturing a well-educated, confident, independent business woman who has discovered a career doing something she loves? Or do you see a dim-witted, down-on her luck, promiscuous girl who lacks the qualifications to procure employment as anything other than a professional sex worker? While you will find examples of each and pretty much everything in between in the adult film industry, the majority of people seem to be under the impression that every girl who works in porn fits the latter description.
I have been accused a time or two of being one crafty son of a bitch. I seem to have the ability to find things other people can't, get to places in record time or even find an entire group of fuck makers (producers, performers, camera guys and starlets) in the valley, get them to buy me drinks and get my "rate" increased to $9000 (or two burritos and a tall can of cheap American beer) a scene just by sending one text message. It is this ability to get shit done that has lead me to success in extensively reviewing porn star cooze with even the most brief encounter. This is an example of said skills.
Check it out - Burning Angel cured the swine flu! We knew Joanna ran a pretty fuckin' boss and bitchin' empire over at BA, but we didn't realize the extent of the magical powers nestled inside the zoobs of the Burning Angel ladies. But fuck us if we don't have actual video proof of the hog disease getting obliterated by Misti Dawn's zoobs!