This week, BUCKTON and the long-lost Lexi LaVey are reuniting to share their feelings on 3rd Degree's recent MILF flick, The Cougar Club. This film's got lots of meaty and mature vaginas in it, as well as a good deal of partly-clothed sex (with Buckton loves), headache-inducing camerawork (which Lexi hates) and two scenes starring James "two-scene" Deen (who is Buckton's "boy", in case you didn't know).

This week's review is a classy-as-fuck number from New Sensations called Addicted 4. It's got ladies in beautiful evening gowns, tables with mirrors on top of 'em that aren't being used for snorting blow (tres fuckin' classy), and dudes like Tommy Gunn and Mick Blue wearing well-tailored dress shirts and shit like that.

It also has classy babes like Ashlynn Brooke, Jenna Haze, and Sasha Grey (who's sporting a classy mound of vagina hair)!

This movie was so mothershittin' classy, in fact, that we felt we had to de-class it a bit. So we made sure your hosts had broken spines and herpes.

That took the prestige right out of there, didn't it?

We're about to whack you over the fuckin' noggin with a whole god damn fuckin' lot of NEW.

First of all, we've got a NEW review of Digital Playground's NEW movie, Control 9, starring their NEW contract girl, Gabriella Fox (which should be a major selling point, considering some of their other contract girls). And if that weren't enough, said review is being spearheaded by our NEW zoobatronic ladyfriend, Morgan (who's got some NEW commentary regarding Tommy Gunn's nutsack)!

Good fucking god. You're not gonna believe the mouth on this woman.

Aaralyn Barra, the most vulgar human being to ever be associated with POPPORN.com (and that's saying something) is back, and she's got a ton of awful shit to say. Aaralyn and Spock are reviewing Jay Sin's Anal Acrobats 2, one of the filthiest and gaping-est joints we've ever viewed, and while it may feature the most graphic anal-debauchery we've ever seen (or even imagined), the review is even worse.

We've been pretty lucky lately. Every movie we've taken the time to review for the past several weeks has been reasonably awesome, which makes our jobs a blast. That means is a double-drag when we come across a bonafide snoozer like Possessed.

Hey fuckaz!

It's been a good run, but we've finally milked the footage from our porn star party weekend for all it was worth. But fuck us if it wasn't worth a hell of a lot.

Finishing up this maverick series of internet films is the always enthralling Kaylani Lei, who joined us for a review of her recent film, Carpool. Not the Carpool with Tom Arnold, sadly. That shit RULED.

Okay, no offense to anybody who we've had on any of our previous videos, and no offense to anybody who's watching our shenanigans week after week, but seriously...if you're not Jack Napier, you ain't fuckin' shit. Jack is a nothing less than king among men, as is evident by his 12-foot penis.

TGIF, bizzos!

Yiz'all ready for yet another round of our celebrity movie reviews? We sure fuckin' hope so, because otherwise we conned Alektra Blue into talking about her awesome interactive sex movie for nothing, and that would be a crying fucking shame.

Hey fuckaz!

Have you seen the recent New Sensations hit, Ashlynn Goes to College? We saw it, and we thought it was a pretty breathtaking piece of adult cinema (also called "peoplefuckin' movies"). It's got it all - comedy, top-of-the-line fuckin', and a dude who looks a lot like Walter Matthau.

Dig this shit, fuckaz! It's none other than the biggest all-lowercase name in the business, jessica drake!

It turns out that jessica didn't read the fine print on the model release she signed for us a little while back, and as such, she's stuck shooting the shit in a room without air conditioning with none other than the two scummiest dudes in Philly (next to Bangs, of course).

Amazing, isn't it? In between our boozed-filled dance parties and drug-riddled sex parties, we scumbangers here at POPPORN still find the time to review a new porno movie. This week, we'll be putting the proverbial screws to Naughty America's My Sister's Hot Friend 12.

Okay, we've spent about a week sifting through all the killer footage from last week's once-in-a-lifetime (for now) party weekend, and we're finally ready to start visually assaulting you with our bombastic flurries of cinematic gold.

We're kicking things off with one of those reliable BUCKTON video reviews that you've come to know and love (or hate and mock). Joining Spock to talk about her latest directorial dicksuckin' effort, Face Invaders 3, is none other than Courtney Cummz, one of the most beautiful yet filthiest ladies in the business.

First of all, this one is NOT related to our all-star weekend. But it is the POPPORN debut of Aaralyn Barra, a pretty well-known pornographer in her own right, so who better to guide you through what may be the most vile film we've ever seen than her awesome smutmakin' ass? While we've seen some shit done to shitters in our lives, we ain't never seen shit like this shit done to any shitty shitters like the shit they do in this movie. If your ass ain't guessed yet, we're talking about buttfuckin'. Serious buttfuckin.

Honestly, if you're got a weak stomach...or even if you don't...brace yourself before watching this thing. Get a puke bag handy. Or a lube tube or something.

We fucked up. Yesterday, June 18th was Randy Spears' birthday, and we fucking missed it. We thought we'd try to make it up to porno's awesomest dude by posting a stellar review of his latest directorial effort on our avant-garde blog. But that all went to shit when, frankly, the movie was a little sub-par.

What comes to mind when you think of the bathroom? If you're MEAT BALL, you think of righteous bowel movements. If you're BUCKTON, you think of doing meth. However, if you're Joanna Angel (or Lexi LaVey, for that matter), you think of fuckin'!