(Whack whack whack whack whack whack whack whack whack whack whackwhackwhackwhackwhack...JIZZ!) Whoo boy. Sorry about that. It's just that most women we meet tell us that we're losers, nerds, geeks or hobbits when we try to talk to them about Sio Bibble, Crix Madine, Poggle the Lesser or Wald. But Lexi Belle actually likes it! Seriously, her nipples get hard when Buckton does his Jabba voice!
We ain't making this shit up, and we got video proof.
The WEEK OF THE STARS is all set to plow forward, tearing down everything in its path with the mighty force of the world's greatest porn stars! Today's video, starring none other than POPPORN's fair-weather girlfriend, Kimberly Kane! Frankly, a one-on-one jaw session with this babe was pretty much our sole motivation for making the trek out to L.A. a few weeks back. So you can imagine how pissed off we were when the chosen meeting establishment wouldn't allow our cameras inside.
Welcome to the POPPORN.com week of the stars! That's right, mothershitters! While grooving up and down the west coast, we spent a few awesome days pissing off the biggest names in the biz, and our alcoholic/narcoleptic editor finally got around to compiling the footage of it for your viewing pleasure!
Plus, the red curtain that we usually use in our "New This Week" videos is at the cleaners getting blood, cum and snot stains out of it (seven months worth), so what better time to feature some on-location laughs?
Assuming you can get the blood, cum and snot images out of your head for a minute, you'll be happy to know that the first week of the stars star we're proud to have starring in our star-studden star-stravaganza is none other than Porn Valley's puffiest-nippled redhead herself, Faye Reagan!