Hey, check it out! We suckered Ann Marie Rios into coming to our office for an interview! And it was fun!

I guess we lied. We didn't quit doing POPPORN. Obviously. I mean, we posted a new article yesterday. And we have a new video today. So, yeah...I guess we're back. We're sorry.

And hey, what better way to return than with our absolute drunkest video ever?

Well, I suppose all good things must come to an end. I suppose the same holds true for amazing things, groundbreaking things and magnificent things. Because, while POPPORN.com has been amazing, groundbreaking and magnificent in it's time (revolutionary and maverick, too), the writing's been splattered all over the wall: it's time to throw in the glove.

Hey! We made this movie! That means that you should totally go buy it, regardless of what this review says. Even though the review turns out to be pretty favorable. I know what you're thinking. You're thinking "wait, you guys made this movie. Of course you're gonna give it a favorable review!", and you're right. But it's not because we're boastful people. It's because this movie really is freaking great. And we know firsthand, because we were the ones who made it so great. For serious.

Hey, we're not afraid to say that something we made sucks. We're mature enough to admit defeat. We just don't put our names on those particular sucky products. Not that The Delinquents is one of them. That shit's pure fucking pornographical gold. For serious.

Man, I love boasting!

I know it seems slightly out of character for us, but we're presenting a video that wasn't shot last year. Nor was in shot two years ago, or even three. As a matter of fact, the video you're about to watch (or may have already watched) was shot just last freaking week. Weird, huh?

See, we got this email from a guy asking about why we don't have new videos so often any more, so we decided to, y'know, try to make some videos in a more timely fashion. And, as luck would have it, yenna happened to be in our ofice with a porno movie she'd recently watched, called Phone Fucks.

Serendipity. Or something quite like it.

As we mentioned last week. It's hard not to love Ryan Keely. So, while we were staring at one of her numerous twitter ass pictures, MEAT BALL chimed in and mentioned, "Hey, I think we have a tape lying around here somewhere that we shot last year featuring Ryan Keely and her amazing ass that we meant to edit and publish but forgot about thus making it an old tape but still worth putting up on the site."

Remember the Exxxotica expo that we went to last summer? I bet you thought we had used up all of our footage from that show, huh? Sure, we posted some interviews with Isis Taylor, Joanna Angel, Penny Flame and a pre-Jersey-shore-feud Taryn Thomas, and it probably seemed like that was all we had, right? Well, we fooled the fuckin' shit out of you, didn't we?

It turns out that there's still lots of footage from the Exxxotica expo that we never even fuckin' used! Feast on that! I bet you didn't even know that we interviewed a clearly non-intoxicated Meggan Mallone while we were there! But we did! And there was no intoxication of any sort occurring the whole time. Believe that. Please.

Before we start, I'll tell you what the best line in this whole video is. It's this: "You'll be fat...as a fuckin' fat retard."

So hey, remember how we said we were gonna milk at least one more episode of our web-video foolishness out of the footage we shot with Stoya last month? Well, fuck, dudes, here it is! In today's video, we'll speak a little bit more with Stoya about what's been going on with her since she disappeared off the face of the Earth last year. Not only that, but we'll also see her tits a little bit, which ought to be cool for you guys, because nobody's seen too much of them since she disappeared off the face of the Earth!

Also, you'll get to see footage of BUCKTON realizing how awful his dick smells! Pure comedy gold!

Hey, Stoya's back!

Kind of. Or not really, I guess. I mean, she's not back shooting new pornography or anything. But, heck, she is back on POPPORN, and that's really what matters to everybody out there, isn't it? No, it's not. But heck, we're gonna go ahead and believe it anyway.

Hey, the Lebowski spoof came out! And we watched it! And it was pretty good! And we made a short video of us talking about it! Hey!

Everyone loves a good party. Friends, libations, off-color humor...mix that with a dive bar in Canoga Park to celebrate Spock BUCKTON, Nate Liquor and Kristina Rose's birthday's and you got yourself one heck of a photo essay. We almost forgot to post these pics, what with all the big deal happening's around these parts, but then we seemed to recall a picture of Kristina Rose's ass on a dirty bar floor that sent us digging thru the image folders.

And lastly this week, we leave you with a trailer for our upcoming, POPPORN produced XXX feature, The Delinquents.

If you're new here, you're gonna want to go back and watch this video and this video before you go any further.

Although, now that I think of it...watching those two slick-ass masterpieces probably won't really help a whole lot to make today's video more coherent. What can we say? The ghost of Ashlynn Brooke is back and wherever that sex-crazed spectre goes, goddamn chaos follows.

Since we posted a new article from our new writer Sparky Sin Claire about her adventures on the set of our upcoming porno-masterpiece, The Delinquents, we thought it might be a good time to give you a little teaser vid of what to expect. Sure, it's a teaser video so it's not gonna tell you a whole lot, but it should be enough to prove to you that once again, we're making ridiculous pornography.

Check this out. We were getting drunk and smoking weed in a parking lot a few nights ago and Bangs happened to find this old tape stuffed behind one of the seats. It turns out that it had a forgotten interview with big-time porno superstar Bree Olson on it. The POPPORN crew taped it months ago when Bree was passing through town doing some "friction dancing" and then we just plumb forgot about it. Hey, we drink a lot! We're bound to forget stuff every now and then!

Anyway, this video rules. Fuck objectivity.