Once asked how she met me, Stoya (you know, the Digital Playground chick who just became AVN's Best New Starlet and shows her face around here sometimes) told the inquiring person, "I got naked in his house."

This is entirely true. She had neon-blue hair and crisscross nipple bars back then, but she otherwise looked exactly the same unclothed. Which I know because that's the state she was in when we met. At my house. And you don't really forget a thing like that, do you? I cannot divulge much about WHY there happened to be a naked Stoya who I'd never previously met in my house just then, but that's the story, and I'm sticking to it.

Point is, we go back a ways, Stoya and me, and since she's in LA at the moment shooting Teachers for Digital Playground, I was holding out high hopes that she'd put in an appearance at my birthday party tonight, which also is the release party for Joanna Angel's Girls Girls Girls II. Actually, it's mostly the release party for Girls Girls Girls II, and Joanna was nice enough to let me elbow in on it a little and play like my birthday has something to do with the proceedings.

But back to Stoya (who I at some point dubbed "Stoyaberry," for what reason I can no longer recall), I was trying for the past several days to get a hold of her so as to inform her of the party details, but she was unreachable. I called, I texted, I stood outside the AVN office shouting into the sky, "STOYABERRY! STOOOOOOYAAAAAAABERRRRRRRYYYYYYYY!" And nothin'.

Finally, late yesterday, she called. She told me she had a long day ahead of her of sexual degeneracy with Jenna Haze, followed by another long day tomorrow of things she can only attend to in LA, and so she wasn't sure if she'd be able to make it. Oh, the crushing sadness!

But it's OK. If my delightful Stoyaberry musters the gumption to make it out, I will of course be overjoyed, but if not, I will content myself with all the other lovely people in attendance, who I welcome to follow her example and get naked before me, so long as they are extremely hot and not attached in any way to a penis. That isn't mine.

Oh, and for more Stoya action, I'd suggest clicking the banner below: