Alright fuck-heads to be clear not everything I rant endlessly about is a bad thing necessarily. Most things are, but some things could potentially turn out to be the greatest shit on earth, I’m just issuing a disclaimer that while some things looks good on paper they have the potential to turn out pretty lousy in the end.

Such is the case with the notion of porn inching its way closer to the collective consciousness of mainstream America. The fact is if pornography is truly becoming increasingly accepted by the American populace then sign me the fuck up. As a longtime advocate of debauchery I can think of nothing more pleasing than the idea of porn escaping from the top shelf of bookstores where it’d been hidden from the view of regular, decent, hard-working Americans.

However, with Dennis Publication’s premier of R-Rated Magazine coupled with Tarantino’s consideration of Tera Patrick for the starring role in his proposed remake of Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill! I’m slightly worried that perhaps it’s a touch of wishful thinking to suggest that these moves indicate that the American people are developing a new perspective on the porn industry.

Again, to be clear, in case you’re unsure, if this proves to be the case then nobody will be happier than me. But if it turns out that these developments have come as a way for popular media to prey upon the adult industry, taking advantage of its “edgy appeal” to generate income, then don’t say I didn’t warn you. Let’s not forget a host of porn stars have already appeared on reality television shows and I know Mary Carey hardly counts because she was on there getting help for her addiction but still, she was there.

Porn has always been a legitimate form of entertainment and the vindication of the industry’s struggle to portray what I can only imagine is everybody’s favorite activity is long overdue. It just wouldn’t be the first time that throngs of fans have been crushed when potentially great acts have been altered beyond recognition by the mainstream media and their seemingly endless supply of cash. I don’t think it’s a stretch, and if you do, fuck off I’m writing this, to compare the situation to the death of what we once knew as punk. What was once possibly the greatest musical genre is now a parade of fools led by mohawked, black-clad caricatures that would make GG Allin want to take a shit (and probably roll around in it).

The so-called “pop-punk” movement seems to possess none of the beliefs, or lack thereof, of what Iggy for example brought to the table. It seems, at least to me, that this hollowed out skull that is pop-punk is just a series of corporate-sponsored imposters who are cashing in on the younger generation’s want for a genre that defines them. So instead of being real artists and creating something in their image these bands and I won’t name names but we all know who they are, are crowding under the same punk umbrella and claiming to possess the same “fuck it” attitude the Sex Pistols flaunted. Of course they can’t push it too far for fear of being dropped by their major record label or banned from cable television but little else will stop them in their quest to sell a lifestyle that I have difficulty believing they themselves subscribe to.

Honestly if I see a “pop-metal” genre spring up on MTV I may eviscerate myself publicly on the set of TR-fucking-L. Luckily the greatest bands out there care little about how much cash they earn outside of the amount they require to keep up their very impressive and long-standing heroin addictions. But now I’ve really gotten off track.

Like I said that’s the worst case scenario, hopefully people are starting to recognize the admirable qualities of the industry. Hopefully Mr. Dennis’ new publication, which I’ve thumbed through (clicked through) and found pretty good, will act as a launching pad for an avalanche of recognition that will have the AVN Awards rivaling the Oscars. Hopefully this whole thing won’t set off a chain of events that will see big-time cash flowing into the coffers of major porn studios while the deviant outsiders are treated like the proverbial red-headed-stepchildren of a once noble i.e. for the most part honest, profession. I say for the most part because I’m still unsure about all the pornographers going over to Thailand and Indonesia and shooting porno on the cheap. Seems a bit like globalization and the whole exportation of jobs thing that’s really been the rage over here. Is there a porn-star union? Of course not, but there should be.

On a slightly related note I’d like to send a big fuck you to the people at Google who in case you hadn’t heard have agreed to cooperate with the FBI in turning over searches made on their widely popular site. I suppose it’s only a matter of time before all venues that challenge the status-quo sell out and cave to the pressures of the market and/or government but it still offends my delicate sensibilities and damn near crushes my naïve ideological belief that some institutions still abide by a set of principles and exist to a small degree for the benefit of the common good. Luckily, if I can survive Lamb of God signing to Jessica Simpson’s former label, this shouldn’t even register as a blip on my radar. Till next time bitches