We've been talking about our bitchin' rad weekend with porn stars for what feels like a billion years now, and who can fucking blame us? Don't answer that question, motherfuckers, or we won't share our plethora of video treasures that we captured over the course of said bitchin' rad weekend. Speaking of which, the plethora of video treasures begins now!

Anyway, as you know, we spent a night at Philadelphia's classiest gentlemen's institution, Club Risqué, partying hard with five of the world's greatest pornographic performers. They danced, they stripped, they poured candle wax all over themselves. Many of you were there, loving the zoobs, chugging the booze and maybe even watching Alektra Blue finger herself.

But some of you made the biggest mistake of your life and didn't go (like poor, poor MEAT BALL, who instead spent the night breaking into the Philly zoo and doing vodka shots with Changbai, the famous tiger cub). For you chumps who couldn't be there, we offer this choice selection of all the glorious skin on display all night.

And keep in mind, when we say "skin", we mean "labia".

Have a great weekend, and enjoy celebrating America's Independence. Go buy something at Wal-Mart or attack a suspected terrorist or something. Just, whatever you do, make sure it ends with you jizzing in somebody's eye.

Then come back on Monday for part two. Later, fuckaz.

PRETTY PUSSIES PLEASE 4

ASHLYNN & FRIENDS 5