According to the Shanghai Daily News, a Chinese man, Teng, downloading porn was surprised to see hidden camera footage of he and his wife having sex in a rural motel in Panyu, China. He complained to the police. Made news all over the country. Turns out it was a different couple. In a different motel. Speaking a different language. Yeah, but they fuck the same. The motel manager is now thinking about suing Teng for making his business look bad. Meanwhile, a sauna manager in Shanghai, tells the paper that hidden cameras are common throughout China in gyms, locker rooms, saunas and bathrooms - for fire safety and security.

Amy Winehouse's producer Mark Ronson says on holymoly.co.uk that he, Sean Lennon and Michael Jackson used to watch strippers on TV together when they were boys. We turned the dial to the porn channel and there were strippers shaking their tits around," Ronson said. "We were like, 'Michael, Michael, how cool is this?' We turned around and he was cringing, saying, 'Ooh stop it, stop it, ooh it's so silly.' We were like, 'Michael, you have to look, maybe you're not seeing it right, it's naked girls!' He was not down with the program whatsoever! "

A Kent schoolboy, age 10, wrote the word p-o-r-n into his class computer search engine as his oblivious teacher stood nearby. The boy printed out the images and brought them home to mom, sort of like your cat dropping a dead mouse on your bed. Damn that faulty filtering software. School computers are now off limits until the problem is fixed. We tried it and this is what we got.

Financial guru Warren Buffett said "boobs." Asked recently in Toronto why companies should sell to him to become part of the Berkshire Hathaway empire, Buffett said: "You can sell it to Berkshire, and we'll put it in the Metropolitan Museum; it'll have a wing all by itself; it'll be there forever. Or you can sell it to some porn shop operator, and he'll take the painting and he'll make the boobs a little bigger and he'll stick it up in the window, and some other guy will come along in a raincoat, and he'll buy it.'' HUH?

Sonny Landham may be better known for his roles in "48 Hours" and "Predator" than his early roles in adult films, but he soon hopes to be known as a senator from Kentucky. He's running as a Libertarian. Holy shit, so the Indian dood that takes it on the fallen tree in Predator swung his own tree for awhile in porn valley?

Spock BUCKTON must be kicking himself that he didn't think of this scam first. The Sydney Morning Herald reports that a 12-year-old New Zealand girl (granted Spock prefers them of legal age) had an online game account hacked into by some perv who removed game credits she had won previously. The girl was later contacted by an anonymous game player who said she would get her credits back if she e-mailed him sexually explicit photos. Over the course of time, the requests became more and more graphic. The girl eventually sent 300 photos. Brilliant.

YOU'VE GOT A MOTHER THING COMING

HELLO NURSE

FUCK MY TITS 4