MEAT BALL PREPARES TO SMEAR HIMSELF UPON LAS VEGAS!

It looks like it's just about that time again. The yearly Las Vegas pornography hullaballoo is getting set to start up in little more than a week's time, and I, against my most fervent wishes, am finding myself forced to attend. Being unable to function among attractive people and unable to While there, I hope that I'm able to secure a reasonably-priced source of drugs for the duration of the week so that I can, with any luck, numb myself into a state of euphoria (or, barring that, complacency) so that I can be confortable enough to stave off suicide at least until I return to a wintery Philadelphia. But, being the pessimistic curmudgeon that I am, my hopes are not high.

It's gonna be fucking awful. Though I will admit that Vegas is...sigh..."so money that it doesn't even know how money it is". Sorry, I was paid to say that.

As you may recall, this website was spawned as a result of my very first trip to Las Vegas, an unbearably long five years ago. Back then, I was a fresh-faced middle-aged man with no particular dreams or aspirations, and I was happy to be part of something that existed outside of my own house. Much has passed over those five years. We made friends with Mick Blue. We made a handful of movies. We guest-starred on Glee. We rose to stardom. We fell from grace. And here we are, in many ways back where we started, making plans to once again enter the sopping-wet grimy fuck-hole that is Las Vegas.

I guess what I'm getting at is that this year's AVN/AEE expo very well may involve one of those murder-suicide things. Most likely at Eli Roth's Goreatorium. No details available as of yet, but be aware. You never know what's going to happen.

All that said, I'm looking forward to a handful of outings planned for the week, including a "deliver-your-own-baby" seminar hosted by Tom Byron. Hip dibbit, dickholes!

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