Earlier today the POPPORN offices were served with legal documents that, for now, effectively shutter our as yet unnamed talent agency. Designed to seduce and lure women into the lucrative world of pornography with promises of mega-global-stardom (stardom that would eventually lead to mainstream work because Hollywood, "digs pussy") our agency was on its way to signing its very first performer, a young woman named Lamburt Monroe, before being served with a cease and desist.

Apparently, a complaint has been filed in Los Angeles Superior Court by some woman named Richard Lloyd Sherman, an "attorney" representing the Licensed Adult Talent Agents Trade Association (LATATA). The complaint seeks to impose injunctions against any talent agency operating in Los Angeles without being fully licensed as such.

The complaint goes on to say that unlicensed talent agencies (like ours WOULD certainly have been) operate without legal or fiscal responsibility. And that's bad how?

We might be idiots, but can anyone suggest a better way to approach and encourage naive individuals into a porn lifestyle than by using an unlicensed and fiscally irresponsible talent agency that is actually just a front to collect some much needed cash off of some poor saps sexual exploitation?

Who the fuck snitched? Since when did pornography become the breeding ground for square business practices and fiscal responsibility? Hell, when did it become responsible at all?

Next thing you'll be telling us that every performer in a porn movie has to be sober when they're performing or be of sound mind to sign a contract! Or you'll tell us that performers have to be tested for STD's within the past 30 days. Jesus, as if the whole, "must be 18 before doing porn" thing wasn't bad enough!

More importantly, who's gonna tell Lamburt that her big shot just went up in smoke?

Obviously, we plan to fight this injunction as completely as financially possible. We reject outright the idea that some hoighty-toighty, 1%'er's in the porn talent agency pool should get to dictate the terms by which all other parasites operate. OCCUPY TALENT! 4EVA!

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DR. CARL DOES ANOTHER PATIENT