ASHLYNN BROOKE & THE JUICY NUGGETS OF TRUTH!

(I apologize in advance for how any times I'm going to refer to you readers as idiots during this story.)

Hey stupid! Don't you wanna know all of the intimate details of Ashlynn Brooke's porn career, starting from her humble beginnings as somebody who doesn't do porn? Don't you wanna hear all the juicy gossip about all those assholes she worked with while she was making adult films? You know, scumbags like Lee Roy Myers and dickheads like whoever the dude in this movie is?

Of course you do, stupid! Well, hold on to your dunce cap, idiot, because Ashlynn's unleashing a no-holds-barred tell-all about her time in the porno industry! Bazoomer!

Ashlynn's story is being told in the form of a web serial, not unlike those George Reeves Superman movies, except these are more like blog entries than movies and Superman's probably not going to be in them. Also, these will mostly be about porn (something sorely lacking in RKO Superman serials). Folks can sign up and log in at AshlyTellsAll.co and learn about all the ups and downs and comings and goings of Ash's porn life. Think you can handle that, you blithering halfwits?

(Hey, according to my thesaurus, "meatball" is a synonym for "idiot"! Bet you didn't know that, shit-for-brains!)

Personally, I'm looking forward to entires about Ashlynn's relationship with Tommy Gunn, her breakup with Rocco Reed (back before we thought he was cool), and, naturally, her life-changing weekend with the POPPORN staff. Not to mention all the other goodies that I don't even know about!

Did I mention how much I, and all of us here at POPPORN, really love this woman? Honestly.

Once again, you stupid fucking dickheads, get yourselves over to AshleyTellsAll.co (and remember that it's dot "co", not "dot com", dummy) and get your learn on! You may also follow Ash's day to day business at her blog, where you'll find her chili recipe as well as stuff about sports!

But, honestly, if you really want the whole Ashlynn Brooke story, including her death and rebirth, you'll watch this epic trilogy (which, for legal reasons, will not be included in her tell-all):