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NEW THIS WEEK - SUPER SQUIRTERS (TOTALLY TASTELESS)

Tue, 05/13/2008 - 12:25pm — MEAT BALL

We bet you were wondering when you were finally gonna get some face time with POPPORN's newest zoob-girl yenna bear. Well, today's the day, folks, and what better way to introduce the young lady and her lovely zoobs than by having her (along with BUCKTON, of couse) review what is easily the scummiest film we're reviewed so far?

This week's pick is courtesy of a studio that truly deserves its name, Totally Tasteless Video. The film, Super Squirters, is packed to to the O-ring with MILFs (mothers I'd like to fuck), MIWLFS (mother's I wouldn't like to fuck), shitty-looking unbleached assholes, asian clams, and of course, squirting.

Also, we take a detour to guide you through the shithole-bleaching process (something everyone should know). So click play, check out yenna bear's zoobs, gaze at Buckton' s righteous 'stache, then click below for some stuff to whack off to.

Dig?


SUPER SQUIRTERS

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Comments

Tue, 05/13/2008 - 5:18pm — Stank (not verified)

Cutest girl Yet

No offense to Lexi or Kate, but damn, she's gorgeous, but here's the thing I NEVER thought i'd say this but i kinda wanted to put a blanket over her or something. She obviously didn't feel comfortable with her shirt off and was like a lost little deer who'd lost her shirt. Now, I'm all for girls being topless who don't necessarily want to be but something about her....

Tue, 05/13/2008 - 5:43pm — Brian Bangs

Um...

You realize how close she is to BUCKTON, right?

I think most girls would be a little shy near that 'stache...

- Not Fade Away

Fri, 05/16/2008 - 11:16am — Ms. Astrid (not verified)

Just wait...

til my next video. I think at one point Spock's mustache fell off. HAHAHAHA.

Domming with Snark!
Ms. Astrid

Fri, 05/16/2008 - 12:38pm — MEAT BALL

She's right

Seriously, everybody. This video's gonna knock your socks's balls out your ass. DICKSUCKING GALORE. I shit you NOT!

Cumming with Sharks!
Mr. Ball

Fri, 05/16/2008 - 2:00pm — yennabear (not verified)

spock's stache

i am most certain it jumped off his face and ran in fear

Tue, 05/13/2008 - 7:06pm — Lexi LaVey (not verified)

no offense taken...

she is damn cute!!!!

and i got lucky enough to be her fluffer, which means i got to keep her nipples hard with my tongue!!!

Yenna, we are sooooooooooo lucky to have you on board! you rock, and keep my pussy moist!

xoxo
lexi

Wed, 05/14/2008 - 2:58pm — Morty Diamond (not verified)

I guess I'm just an old fart then

I prefer my girls to have a higher flesh-to-metal ratio than 50%. Hey bangs, got any chicks that aren't all tattooed out?

Wed, 05/14/2008 - 4:27pm — Brian Bangs

We're still new...

We'll be adding all types of ladies...patience Morty!

- Not Fade Away

Wed, 05/14/2008 - 4:50pm — MEAT BALL

...?

Can we get some amputees?

Fri, 05/16/2008 - 11:15am — Ms. Astrid (not verified)

Right here...

I prefer marks on other people :)

Domming with Snark!
Ms. Astrid

Wed, 05/14/2008 - 4:54pm — Jeff (not verified)

gentlemen please

When I saw this thread begin, I was afraid the conversation would devolve into junior high schoolyard banter. Hopefully, I'm not too late. First of all, kudos to Lexi for stepping up and putting her nipple in the dike (okay, an admittedly lame analogy - the point is she tried to stop comparisons of the girls). The Fact is each girl brings a unique physical and emotional beauty to the site. Let us ALL celebrate that. Here are my impressions:

  • Yenna - underneath her body markings, she has the look of a girl that would sell cookies at your door. Underneath that, I believe beats the heart of a tiger. Contrary to previous discussions, I don't think she was intimidated by Spock as much as bored by him.
  • Lexi - when you said back here that your breasts are natural, omg. Because they look fake, but in the good fake (firm and pert), and none of the bad fake (sacks filled with silicone). It appears you like to come off as bad ass, but really just want to be someone's kitty. Put another way, you will put another's pleasure above your own - if properly motivated.
  • Kate - what a great girl. For me, she is the type of girl I'd like to have a beer with before taking her back to my place to do whatever she would let me do to her.
  • Ms. Astrid - exceedingly beautiful complexion and magnificent bodily form. Being a fellow Dom, I won't say anymore because there is a good chance it will either be taken as cowering to your authority or disrespecting it. However, I will say that I thought your review of the The Passion Wave Butterfly was cute, fun, and hilarious (I didn't add informative because I wasn't the intended audience).
Wed, 05/14/2008 - 11:12pm — yenna bear (not verified)

heart of a tiger?

nope. heart of a bear. get it right.

Thu, 05/15/2008 - 11:42am — Spock BUCKTON

Damn straight!

And there's no fuckin' way she was bored by me. It was probably all the dudes behind camera touching their boners that had her a tad bit disturbed. Now excuse me, because Batman RIP ain't gonna read itself.

Thu, 05/15/2008 - 12:10pm — Jeff (not verified)

my apologizes

not to be cute, but I was thinking a heart of a tiger, soul of a bear.

Bears would prefer to eat berries (except when the salmon come run'n and they can just reach out and grab a snack)

Tigers love to chase their prey and gnaw on their flesh

Tue, 05/13/2008 - 5:41pm — Anonymous (not verified)

Dude, that girl is fucking

Dude, that girl is fucking cute...

Tue, 05/13/2008 - 5:41pm — Anonymous (not verified)

what the hell is a yenna

what the hell is a yenna bear? is that some like secret code or monster?

Wed, 05/14/2008 - 9:21am — MEAT BALL

YES

It IS a secret code. An anagram, actually.

It translates to "nennar bay" , which is a small inlet off the Chesapeake where the CIA genetically modifies female ejaculate for counter-terrorism purposes.

Also, it's a type of bear.

Wed, 05/14/2008 - 8:40am — Anonymous (not verified)

SPOCK RULES!

SPOCK RULES!

Wed, 05/14/2008 - 1:57pm — Spock BUCKTON

DAMN STRAIGHT!

Thanks Anonymous! Usually I think you guys are assholes.

Wed, 05/14/2008 - 8:40am — Anonymous (not verified)

My question is if you are

My question is if you are reviewing a squirting movie, does Yenna or Spock squirt? THAT is the real mystery here!

Wed, 05/14/2008 - 9:22am — MEAT BALL

GUZZ

Can't speak for Yenna but I've definitely seen Spock squirt guzz onto folks faces. Only with guys, they don't call it squirting. They call it guzzing.

Wed, 05/14/2008 - 5:46pm — Jeff (not verified)

anal anatomy 101

Class - please refer to the following diagram for our sphincter vs. asshole discussion.

  1. As you can see, the dilation of the anal sphincter is what forms what is commonly referred to as the "asshole."
  2. The anal sphincter and anus are surrounded by the gluteal muscles that form what is commonly referred to as the "ass."
  3. As you can also see by the diagram, there is no clear physical demarcation between the anus and the rectum.

Point #3 is important to remember, especially when it cums to watching "anal sex." It is possible for the actress (or actor, according to your tastes) to have her anus penetrated without having the rectum expanded. Thus, I like to use the expression up her ass, instead of in her ass. In her ass only {he says with a smile} takes dilation of the sphincter to allow the cock to enter the anus. Whereas up her ass, requires the girl's rectum to accommodate the length of your girth. You know you have filled her rectum once you reach her sigmoid colon - for almost all men, this will require external equipment.

I would be curious to get the insights from resident anal experts, namely Stoya. Her Cheerleaders scene with Manuel Ferrara appears to be an excellent example of up her ass.

Thu, 05/15/2008 - 11:37am — Spock BUCKTON

Wow...

I don't know if I wanted to know all that. But now that I do, I'm totally gonna use this knowledge to talk ladies into buttscrewin'.

Thu, 05/15/2008 - 12:56pm — Jeff (not verified)

no talky, just dooy

My advice Spock, don't tell them your newfound knowledge - show them.

And one last piece of advice - her sphincter is your friend. Most guys think of it as their enemy (damn asshole is too tight, I'll shove harder). The wanting ass begs for the sphincter to open, but it must be coaxed - remember it is not a completely voluntary muscle (which is also why Stoya has such a challenge teaching it to chew gum).

Speaking of which, for the advance course, I speak to the little know inner sphincter. This is formed by the thickening of the circular smooth muscle of the rectum... release of the inner sphincter is the gateway to up her ass, should you be so lucky - as it is an involuntary muscle, which is why so many women don't enjoy anal, b/c ultimately they have to give up... their ass* :-)

* inner anal sphincter

Fri, 05/16/2008 - 2:16pm — Spock BUCKTON

All good points but honestly...

ass sex kinda grosses me out. Both ways.