This week: Charlie Sheen gets porn parodies made of him, and offered roles in porn movies. Who would have ever seen that coming? G'day. My name is Crocodile Dundee and I'm a sex addict. Paris Hilton sex tape, now on your cell phone so…yay?

Porn director make porn parody is the XXX equivalent of dog bites man. But a novelization based on a porn series? That's just mind blowing, man.

It's not a drug, but it is a porn movie about Charlie Sheen. It will be the most winning-ist and tiger blood-ist porno ever made. (Full disclosure: I'm in it. Strangely, the real Charlie Sheen is not.)

Porn company pens a letter to Charlie Sheen about doing porn. Of course. Winning! Tiger blood!

Sex toys that never should have seen the life of day — but did. (But thank God no one made a Rosie O'Donnell sex doll.)

For a country started by convicts, they sure are pussies: Australians claim sex, porno addiction on the rise.

More good news for lawyers suing P2P porn cases. And by good news, I mean their cases got tossed. Again. Anyone notice a pattern here?

Penthouse to launch 3D porn channel, men's sexuality to be challenged when hard-ons pop off the screen.

In case you've been in a coma, abducted by aliens and living under a rock in the last 10 years and haven't seen Paris Hilton's sex tape, it's now available on mobile phones. It's like herpes on your iPhone.

What's new in Juliland.com: Give March jGrrl Aiden Ashley the glad hand as she makes her debut in two photosets and one video. Later this week: stills of Ash Hollywood and a movie of Ruby Knox!

And don't forget: BobbiStarr.com — the only source of porn you'll ever need.

BUSH

OFFICIAL REVENGE OF THE NERDS PARODY