Hey, we got more porno spoof news for you! Weird, huh? I mean, when was the last time you heard about a porno company creating a parody of a popular TV show or movie? All sarcasm and bitterness aside, the particular parody property in question today is actually very near and dear to my heart, and I'm looking forward to this thing with every fiber of my being. You see, New Sensations is preparing to give the triple X treatment to none other than Joel and Ethan Coen's The Big Lebowski, a film that I (and I'd wager a good deal of you) have seen at least 150 times and can pretty much quote from beginning to end.

No word yet on the cast, mainly because director Lee Roy Meyers is throwing in a neat-o little twist that I don't believe has ever been done on a porn film of this magnitude: he's holding open auditions for a handful of the film's classic characters, including Jeffrey Lebowski (the rich, wheelchair-bound one, not the dude), Walter (ably played by John Goodman in the original), Brandt (Philip Seymour Hoffman's finest performance to date), Blonde Treehorn Thug (the guy who roughs the Dude up in the beginning of the movie. Not the Chinaman. The Chinaman is not the issue here.), The Stranger (a sasparilla enthusiast) and Liam (the silent bert to John Turturro's pedophiliac Ernie). These roles are all being written as non'sex roles for the time being, but word is, Meyers and his team will consider re-writing any of these roles for any actors who feel that they're ready to go that extra mile.

As far as the principal characters go, I can only hope that they find somebody worthwhile to fill Jeff Bridges' white russian-stained bowling shoes. While I'm sure there are a great many talented male actors capable of pulling it off, I gotta say, I can't think of anybody who would be right for it. Not at the moment, anyway.

Anyway, if you're interested (and we gotta assume you are), send your name, phone number, link to audition video (preferably uploaded to youtube or facebook or some shit like that) and the role you're auditioning for to LebowskiAuditions@newsensations.com. Do it now!

This has me thinking. The idea of spoofing a film from such acclaimed and well-regarded directors is a bit of a foray into new territory for the porn world. I'd really like to see where it takes us. If this film does well, can we expect to one day see Barton Fink XXX or This Ain't The Man Who Wasn't There? And from there, what's next? Does porn delve deeper into art cinema? Chungking Express XXX? This isn't Down By Law XXX? Not Koyaanisqatsi?

Lord, I can only hope.

And, in case you're wondering, included with the Lebowski press release was a piece of mail address specifically to POPPORN saying that we have been pre-emptively turned down for any and all roles in this film or any in the future. So sucks to that.

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